After my review of “Emily Wants To Play,”  some of you readers may have asked yourselves: “What would it be like if this game were even worse?” Unfortunately for me, I have found out the answer to that hypothetical. The answer is that it would be “Francisca.”

“Francisca” is more or less a haunted house story. The character plays the role of a 14 year old boy named Mike, who has just moved into a new house. Shortly after moving in, Mike’s parents decide to take a trip to Mexico for a week and leave Mike behind for some reason or another. Mike is thus left alone in the house. However, the house happens to be haunted by the ghost of a little girl who used to play hide and seek with the people who lived in what is now Mike’s home. Every night while Mike’s parents are gone, the ghost delivers a present to Mike’s house which begins a hide-and-seek game with the stakes being Mike’s life. Or something like that. It is pretty vague, to be honest.

“Francisca” does not look bad at first glance. The graphics are all suitably modern. None of the textures are too low resolution, none of the initial models seem to be too poorly made (until Francisca herself shows up). However, the game suffers from some serious frame rate issues. The game just moves far too slowly. You know how old anime cartoons, like Speed Racer or Gigantor only had a few frames per second? “Francisca” is kind of like that. It’s nowhere near as smoothly animated as it needs to be. The ghost’s design is just supremely lazy, as well. It’s a girl with a slightly too large head, and facial features that are too small for said head. It’s nothing notable, it’s nothing good.

There is very little in the way of audio in “Francisca.” What is there really doesn’t need to be. There are only two sound effects that matter in the game. There are the footfalls of the main character, Mike, and occasional giggling from the ghost. Both of these sounds are, at the very best, poorly implemented. At worst, they’re poorly designed sound effects that don’t really fit with anything else in the game.

“Francisca” is night unplayable. The player will spend far more time setting up video cameras to help them deal with the ghost than they will actually trying to evade said ghost. Also, the game fails to explain several parts of its core mechanics to the player. For instance, it says that closing the character’s eyes will reduce the fear meter and help to save your life. What it fails to mention is that this only works under certain circumstances, depending on the proximity of the poorly designed ghost.

I know that “Francisca” only costs a dollar and that some of you out there may be thinking “Surely it can’t be as bad as all that.” Trust me, though. It can be that bad, and in fact is. Save your money. Save your time. “Francisca” is terrible.