I was willing to be persuaded. I was willing to be convinced. I was open and accepting of the possibility of a Ghostbusters reboot.

And then I saw the first trailer. And it made me want to kick a baby.

But I recovered, and I tried to be pragmatic about it. Maybe they’re saving the good parts for later. Maybe the next trailer will be better. Maybe.

And then I saw the second trailer. And it scared the hell out of me.

Reboots can be fun and interesting and respectful, like the newest Star Trek reboot that took very familiar characters and made them refreshing and new.  The new version of Maniac, starring Elijah Wood, is a creepy gorefest that unnerved the hell out of me. Remakes can be great.

Or they can be derivative, hacky pieces of pop culture gutterballs that look bright and shiny but have nothing at its core: no soul, no heart (I’m looking at you, Dark Shadows)(and maybe you too, Friday the 13th 2009)(and I see you hiding in the corner, Psycho 1998).

Ahem.

The new Ghostbusters trailer starts out promisingly deceptive: it looks like a trailer to a legitimately scary movie about ghosts, and then there’s a moderately clever punchline. Okay. I perked up.

And then I was let down. Way, way down.

It’s like the filmmakers had a checklist that they were ticking off as they went: exact same logo? Check. Nerdy receptionist? Check. Firehouse headquarters? Check. Three white ghostbusters, one black one? Check. Pleasant-looking library ghost who turns into scary ghost? check. Green Slimer ghost with the exact same design? Check. A line about “mass hysteria?” Check. Giant white puffy ghost terrorizing city? Check.

Unlike some pieces I’ve read, I do not think that’s the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man at the end (thank God-that would have put me over the top). My guess is it looks like a ghost from the old Casper The Friendly Ghost TV series. He’s got kind of a weird swirly pointy head, and a bowtie.  Maybe it’s their own logo come to life.  I could be wrong. I couldn’t care less.

I actually was interested when they first announced female Ghostbusters, and I really like these actresses for those parts. They’re funny, original, strong voices in comedy, and that’s a plus in my book.

But they’re just not given anything original to do or say in this trailer. It scares me that someone (a bunch of someones, really) thought it would be a good idea to have this movie just copy the first movie in so so many ways.

I can’t work up any enthusiasm for this thing. It’s just a big pointless void in my mind right now. I wish I could have watched this trailer and been invigorated, anxious, and excited. But I’m not.

Your mileage may vary.