Welcome back fans of undead flesh eaters and those who somehow survive in their world despite a string of close calls.  It’s been a long haul waiting to find out how the few remaining living in the Township of Alexandria have survived not only a massive walker invasion, but each other.   And the episode starts….BY NOT STARTING THERE… (as Charlie Brown would say, “ARGH!!!!!”)

SPOILER ALERT!!!

Daryl Sasha and Abraham driving a gas tanker and are stopped in the road by a group of bikers, immediately disarmed and told all their stuff now belongs to Negan. Abraham doesn’t want to hand over his weapon, and is advised by the biker gang leaders about having to eat shit….best not to nibble “Bite chew swallow repeat.”   They send a member of the gang with Daryl to the back of the gas truck, to search for more weapons, food or whatever, Abraham asks who Negan is, Sasha tries to stop him, and Negan’s gang leader goes into a long drawn out monologue about how he is supposed to just kill one of them to prove a point as soon as they meet a new group anyway.  They are both about to get shot for asking the questions, when suddenly all of bikers blow up….(On Screen!!!!)….(No really!!! It was fricking amazing!!!!)   Darryl has taken the whole biker gang out with a bazooka, and the biker who was sent to search the back is lying in a pool of blood.  Daryl has been sliced in the back, but is too cool to worry about it right then.

Meanwhile back in Alexandria, the whole “Sam’s call to his mother as they were trying to quietly slip past a huge horde”,  that was the cliffhanger of the first half of the season seems to have been forgotten!?!? (what a cop out writers!!!) As he, Jesse, Sam, Gabriel, Carl, Michone, and Rick, still covered in zombie guts (at least), are slowly wandering through the middle of the horde that has infested the town.

By the way, if it’s that easy to get past walkers, why doesn’t everyone just splash on some ode de la walker every day and go about their business?   Some of the ideas lately hold up and some just leave us scratching our head.

Rick has a new plan to go back to the quarry get the vehicles and lead the walkers from town because there are too many of them.  Gabriel suddenly grows some balls and decides to watch Judith in his church because the journey is a long one for the infant.  Sam refuses to stay behind and will only stay with his mom.  We can only somewhat hope he learns something on the journey (or doesn’t make it back…even better)   Carl takes Ron’s hand…weird since a few minutes ago Ron was trying to kill him and they make their way out of town.

Morgan and Carol wake up (after being knocked out) with Tara, Rosita, and Eugene in the brownstone, the wolf long gone, Carol knows instinctively that Denise was kidnapped,  immediately snaps (concussion be dammed) into sentry mode and starts searching the brownstone.  Denise and the wolf in the meantime are not really that far away with their backs against a wall as the horde is walking around them.  He seems to know how to keep her alive for now at least.

Glen and Enid hide in a church and start searching for any hidden weapons.  Glenn tells Enid to hold on to all the people who have made you who you are.  He names off all the people who have died including (Hershal, Andrea, Tyrese, and Dale) who he has learned from and who have made him who he is.  She refuses to stay put and will help him save Maggie who is still stuck up on the top of the platform.  Sure enough they find a pistol and bullets in a small cigar box (people smoked in this church?!?)

The Wolf is claiming he is going to help Denise change like he changed to become more who he is.  It’s not Norman Bates crazy enough to be cool.  Just child molester creepy.

Enid heads out with Glen and suddenly its dark.  Continuity usually isn’t a big concern of mine, and I am able to suspend disbelief, but it’s jarring this time and kind of transparent as a setup for whatever is going to happen should happen in the dark.

Meanwhile nearby in the suddenly dark woods, the walker-gut covered, holding hands across Walker-America, class field trip continues to slowly snake its way through the “monsters.”  “Shore ‘nuf” Sam starts to freak out, why now we aren’t sure.  He had made it this far with only nearly getting everyone killed once. Fortunately he refuses to calm down and then gets eaten.  “Yay!!!!!”  Thank you walking dead writers. That was a gift. Jesse screams and the walkers notice.   Then she is quickly bitten and gone as well but not before Rick has to cut off her arm to set Carl free because she has a death grip on him as she is becoming walker dinner. Ron picks up a dropped revolver that has appeared during the ruckus and plans to shoot Rick for all the evil that has befallen his amazingly dysfunctional and rapidly deceasing family, until Michone stabs him through the back with her katana, causing Ron to miss and shoot Carl in the eye.   Pretty gruesome and yet amazing effect, we see the huge bullet hole and empty eye socket just before Carl falls flat to the ground.  Michone and Rick carrying the obviously rapidly dying carl run into the darkness.  Michone slicing her way through whatever crosses their path. (Which would have been so much easier to begin with.  Why didn’t we just do that?!?!)

Eugene is back in the house with a machete claiming he understands they are going to have to fight their way out at some point.  Tara doesn’t believe him.   Denise and the wolf are going to find a gap and make it over to the guard post and over the wall.  The wolf makes it to the ladder but, Denise gets caught and the wolf comes back to save her and gets bitten.  She makes a deal with him.  Get her back o t her infirmary and she will save his life.  They head back into town.

Morgan confronts Carol about who she had in her life and loved and lost.  Carol says she should have killed him, but he says she can’t.  (I honestly wouldn’t count on that one Morgan!)

Denise and the wolf are almost to the infirmary.  He is babbling about how he could have made it the ladder was clear.  “Maybe you changed” Denise points out, but before they can get all the way back to save his life Carol shoots him from the nearby balcony and takes him out. Another gift from the show writers!!!!!! Change sometimes happens too late. Denise does run away makes it to the infirmary just in time to see Rick, Michone, and rapidly dying Carl, running back into town.   Rick knowing that his son is getting treated sees all the walkers outside and goes “bat shit” crazy heading out the door with an axe. Michone wants to run and help but Denise needs her help stitching up Carl.  As soon as she is done, Michone, Spencer, Heath, and Aaron rush out into the street and help with enhance the carnage.  Soon more of the town is running out with weapons to kill what they can.  Gabirel seeing what is happening outside grabs his machete and walks out after saying “We have been praying that God would save our town, well God will save Alexandria because he has given us the courage to save it ourselves. “  Soon Morgan, Carol, and even Eugene are out joining the fight.  But not before giving one of the most inspirational speeches he has given.  “No one gets to clock out today And Hell, this is a story people are gonna tell”

Glen and Enid reach the tower Maggie is on just as it is about to fall.  Glen starts shooting to lead the horde away.   Enid climbs the tower with her makeshift rope and gets Maggie to a safe spot on the wall.  The horde is about to pull Glen down for the last time when Abraham, and Sasha start plowing them down with machine guns from the top of another wall.

Yes folks Glen has 9 lives and I’m not sure he has many left, but he is still with us today.

They help Maggie and Enid onto the water truck as Glen hops into the front with Darryl.  Glen wants to lead them away a few at a time.   Daryl being the bad-ass he is want to take them out all at once.   He leaves a pool of gas from the tanker truck in the middle of the city and ignites it with the bazooka.  The Townspeople inspired by all those who have embraced the courage to stand against the undead invaders, are all finally in the fight for their town, see the flames from the huge fire and watch most of the walkers stagger themselves into the sea of flames.   (Once again if it was that easy why weren’t fires set all over the place when the outbreak occurred!?!?!)  Those that don’t meander to their own fiery re-demise are hacked apart by an a town now filled with walker ass-kickers.

As the sun is up.  The exhausted residents sit on the porch of the infirmary.  Daryl is getting patched up from his knife wound.  Rick is talking to Carl in a coma.  He says he was wrong, he thought these people couldn’t learn, but today he saw what they could do.  Dianna was right.  They can find others and rebuild the walls, expand and grow as a community.  When he was out there with them and it was over, when he knew they had regained the town.  Rick had a feeling that took him a while to remember what it was.   Rick wants to save the world for Carl now.  He wants to show him the new world.  Carl closes his fingers around his father’s hand.   We know at least part of him is still alive in there.  But when Rick regains faith in humanity, massive destruction is only a few episodes behind.

It’s great to have The Walking Dead back isn’t it folks?